Friday, June 29, 2007

I read a blog this morning about having a place of your own. Finn had her spot on her tiny patio.
She is right, Dh and I have struggled our entire 40 years over "equal" space in our shared space.
This starts with closet and drawer space and moves on to space in the garage, book get the picture. I think the struggle comes from childhood where neither one of us really had our own space growing up. In both our families, just having a bed to sleep in was a blessing. We have worked it out though, not always quietly but in our marriage there is lighting and then there is thunder.................and I would never give up that lighting!

It made me think about how I need my own "time" as well as space. In the years when there were three children to make demands on every minute, we both had little time to call ours. Now that retirement is fast coming up on the horizon, I am wondering how having time to ourselves is going to work. We have always made sure that when he was home, so was I and we were a team. When he went to work, I had my time or we worked out that we would both do our thing at the same time. So, not sure I am ready for a 24/7 husband no matter how much I love being with him. Really not sure he is ready for a 24/7 wife either.

Funny how each stage of life has its different challenges. I am sure there are singles and widows out there that would tell me they would gladly give up "their" time to not be alone. I am sure I would feel that way too if that was where I was in my life, but you can't live your life by what someone else feels. We will need to work on what works best for us.................just like the constant struggle to have equal space on OUR space.


That for over 40 years we have been together in the same space

Hopefully continued good health for this time of our life


1 comment:

QuiltingFitzy said...

I am lucky I know, I have a room for sewing. I never had my own space growing up, nor during the first 24 yrs. of marriage to dh#1.

Dh#2 and I prefer to be together 24/7 and even when I take some time to sew, he wanders in to check-in. I found our tolerance for separation is 45-60 minutes, lol.

Me working has become an adjustment, we miss each other like crazy.

I'm amazed at this relationship, it just wasn't in existance with #1, but then again, neither of us really tried.

Don't sweat the small stuff, as they say, you'll figure out your new rhythm.